Wow, Where Did The Time Go?

Okay, so I havn't updated this blog in such a long time! Little did I realize it has been over three months since I last blogged here! It's been such a busy three months, I do not even know where to begin.

In October, I began back to work at Southern Oaks Nursing Home three nights a week after classes each night. AFter months there, I am still there. I am very attached to some of the residents again. Many are there that were there the last time I worked there from June 2005 through July 2007. Some remembered me and were very happy to have me back in their lives. Now, it's Christmas time, and we got to choose "angels" with the residents names on them. I chose one of a gentleman in which I have had a good relationship with since beginning work there 3 1/2 years ago. For some reason, he stands out to me and so I chose him. Since the items on his list are very generic (I don't think they really ask the residents what they want), I am going to add a few items along with what is on the list.

ALso, some great things happened since September. I was offered my position back at the physicians office doing massage therapy twice a week. Also, I have been allowed to set up shop in a salon over in Fairfax. I'm getting lots of work for the doctor, and steadily building my business up in Fairfax.

Tonight, we are expecting ice. It's Oklahoma...it went from 73 degrees today to a mere 17 degrees in less than ten hours. In a short 3 hours it went from 73 to 33. Where else can you find such a large change?! Nowhere! We are expecting ice tonight, but we shall see what happens. It wouldn't be bad getting a day off, but we shall see.

Sari is growing into such a big girl! She's writing sentences now that are phonetically correct. It's amazing how much she has learned and developed this year! She is active in girl scouts DAisies. Her troop earned their first patch last Thursday for knowing the Girl Scout promise. Her besties CAssidy and Kourtney also go...not to mention they all have the same haircut! Sari has made so many new friends in Cushing. She loves her friends, and has had several boyfriends this year...one at church and one at school...sometimes two. She's a lil heartbreaker already!

Shaw has been given a wonderful opportunity to go back to school. The VA has offered to pay his tuition, fees, expenses AND give him a monthly additional salary. He will obtain his degree in human resources and management. The next two years he will be back in college with all the young kids. hehe This has been a plus for us because I was able to cut back on work one night a week...so we are all excited about that as well.

Our church ward's Christmas social is this weekend. I think I'm going to bake my homemade apple and peach pies to take with us. It's the first church social I will be able to attend, so I am very excited! If anybody has any great dessert ideas I'd love to hear them!

Lastly, Shaw and I have been discussing our issues with not getting pregnant easily, etc. We have decided that if we are unable to conceive before he graduates (2 years), we will adopt. We want more children, and do not mind if adopt. The main issue is the legal costs. However, pregnancy is difficult for us due to my PCOS. Therefore, chances of us conceiving a viable pregnancy is very low. So, we are exploring other options to having more children. Our hearts are big enough to love children that may not be biologically ours. It is something I have always had the desire to do, and perhaps in a few years we will do it, depending on how things go.

Well, that is all for now. It's late and I must try to get some sleep so I can massage the patients at the clinic! That's IF I don't get iced in the house! :)

Time moves by fast....

Sari is getting big. She's 5 now and in kindegarten. The other day she came home and told me that a boy in her class declared himself her boyfriend. Now, last year in Pre-K she said she had boyfriends, but they didn't know...just in case they told her they didn't want to be. But this time, oh this time, HE told HER that HE was her boyfriend. I guess this all took place while playing dodgeball in PE class.

Time has flown by! It seems like yesterday I was bringing her home from the hospital. Her tiny little head could fit in my hand. Her feet were just a little bigger than my thumbs. Now, she's about 42 inches tall, 40 pounds and talks all the time. She dresses herself, gets her own drinks out of the fridge. She can do basic math, recognize and write letters and numbers and is joining DAISIES (Girl Scouts for the young ones). Oh, and she plays Mario brothers and can get pretty far! I keep wondering where my baby went..?

Shaw had his surgery. He made it through like a trooper. He did have to stay the night at the VA OKC hospital one night. His neck looks like somebody slit his throat open and he gets the strangest looks from people now. hehe But he's dropping weight (almost 10 pounds in a week). So he's super excited about that.

School is going fine. These young girls in my classes are so funny. The things they worry about...haha I laugh at their petty issues. Yes, I am the old lady in all my classes. Their eyes get as big as saucers when they hear my response to their questions of me being married and kids. These girls get stressed out about their roommates or boyfriends giving them some grief. They don't work because their parents pay for everything. It's like I want to say "okay girls, just wait 10 years to finish school. Have a kid or two, get married, and let life happen. Then, start back to school and attempt to juggle your kid, husband, school, commuting, bills and personal obligations...then tell me your stressed" Ah, I know I"m begin hard on them. They are lucky to get their education done now before they are tied down to all that. It's just humorous is all.

Well, have lost 11 pounds now. My jeans are falling off when I walk and Im' beginning to see my jaw bone again. :) Till next time....

Life.

This past couple of weeks has been very interesting. I resigned from my position at the hospital, for one. After seeing some things happen that shouldn't have, and dreading work every night due to over working the CNA's, I quit. Leaving a job, especially after working there just a short while is not something I like to do. But, sometimes, you have to realize that if you don't like what your doing, it's time to change.

I applied to OSU the 14th of August, and was accepted the 18th. Yes, classes started the 18th too! I enrolled the 20th and went to class the 22nd. I am getting my degree in elementary education. All of my high school "career tests" indicated I would be great at teaching or counseling. So, since I like kids and did always want to be a teacher when I was younger, I thought why not? My classes are going great. I enjoy learning some new things and feel like there are endless possibilities now. Thankfully, I qualified for plenty of financial aid so I don't have to work this semester or next unless I just want to. It's been a long time since I have been in that position.

As for the health watch....It's getting better I think. I've lost 10 pounds in the past two weeks. I'm finally down to 195. My goal is another 45 pounds. After next week I'm going to start going to the Colvin center on the days I have class.

Shaw has surgery on his parathyroid Tuesday. He's nervous--actually very nervous about it. I can't blame him, he's going to have his throat slit open. If they accidently sever one nerve he will have a hoarse voice forever, if they cut both of them, he'll have to have an emergency tracheotomy and won't be able to talk. Scary! I'll update after he has surgery.

Health Watch

Today I went back to my doctor for results of many tests I have taken over the past month. It was a real eye opener, and I'm thankful I went to my doc. I know I havn't taken much care of my body in a long time. My diet leaves much room for improvement, and I am practically sedentary at home.

The first bit of information was that there were no cysts or signs of recent cysts on my ovaries. Alright...we are doing good there. Then, I was informed that the CT scan I had on my brain several weeks ago caught something. This something is a sinus vein that is longer than it should be. It goes right through my Right Frontal Lobe...not normal. It poses an increased risk for strokes and aneurisms (sp?). For years I have noticed that when I am upset, or my blood pressure is high, I have a thobbing dull pain on the right side of my brain. I have always wondered about it..hoping it was okay. But now, I know what the cause of this pain is. Lastly, I was informed that my cholestorol was great at only 160. However, my TRIGLYCERIDES were 572! The normal is ONLY 100-200. Plus my blood pressure was 168/84..wow!

My physician prescribed me some diet pills and required me to schedule an appt. with the dietician. He told me I HAVE to start exercising outside of work AND start eating right. From the information I have found about high tri's, calorie counting is the biggest culprit. Excess calories can be turned into tri's...therefore, it's EXTREMELY important to limit your calorie intake to only the amount you can burn in a day. I have to "weigh" in once a month to make sure I'm making progress too.

What it all boils down to is if I want to be around to watch my daughter grow up, I MUST make some lifestyle changes. This is something I don't like very well. But, at 204 pounds, 5'2" I am NOT healthy and must start now. At this moment, I am a ticking time bomb. I could "go off" at any time. Dwelling on that aspect will get me nowhere. However, making the changes necessary to continue to live a healthy and long life are crucial at this point. It's a crossroad, and I must choose. One path will lead me to an early grave. Another will lead me to a healthier, longer life. It's no longer a game to make excuses for...it's not only one that affects me, but my husband, my daughter, and any future children.

More Possibilities

The other night at work was a true eye opener. It was me and one other aide for 33 patients. It was busy, crazy and not an environment I felt safe working in at that point. We were running ragged by the time the morning came around. To top things off, a patient coded and died in the last hour of our shift. I froze. The CNA's are the ones that perform CPR. Thank God the aid from upstairs got to the scene first. I watched a patient die that shouldn't have died. So, it became clear to me that I have to get out of health care. I may be an okay CNA, but this is not what I wish to do forever. This is not something I wish to continue with more education. The decision to pursue a non medical job and career have now became my desire. Watching a patient die isn't something new. However, it was a culmination of the entire night that made me realize healthcare is no longer the profession I should be in. Employers care more about saving money by cutting staff than keeping patients safe and satisfied.

On the otherhand, speaking of health care....I've been sick...alot this week. Headaches, nausea/vomitting, aches, and fever. I feel like crap.

Maybe

So for those of you who know us, you probably know we are trying to conceive again. This is a pretty big challenge considering my PCOS. However, we felt the time is right to try to have another baby together. Afterall, Sari is five in August! Yes, she will be 5! We miss a baby around and just feel it's a good time. So, this past week, we waited for the time to be right. I'm really hoping we are preggers. For one, my face went from being very clear lately to suddenly you can connect those red dots. haha. Secondly, I started having horrible indigestion again...something I rarely have outside of pregnancy. Although it's not been long, I keep hoping that maybe these are very early signs of a bun in the oven? Today when I wake up, I'm going to start keeping track of my basal body temp. Anything 99F for me is good. Normally after I ovulate, my BBT sits at around 98.3 or so. If I see anything leaning to 99, I'll have reason to celebrate (after 3 consecutive days). So wish us well, and keep us in your thoughts and prayers.

New Job/Health Update

These past few weeks have been nice and relaxing....And, sadly, the time for me to start my new job at the hospital came around. Last week I started working during the nights again. Suprisingly it was easier to stay up all night than I thought! My job is okay...but certainly not what I want to do forever. I've decided I'm going to go on and get either my LPN or go back to RN school...depending on which program takes me first.

Last week I had gone to my physician for a diabetic screening since my PCOS is very closely linked to type II diabetes. My AC1 came back at 5.6, which is great. And, my average glucose levels were only 126! Again, great news! So, my physician decided it would be good for me to have a CT scan of my brain. His thinking was that perhaps my PCOS symptoms are really not PCOS, but rather a lesion or abnormal growth on the hypothis of my brain. So, I underwent a CT scan...not sure how it turned out yet. The 7th, I will have an ultrasound of my ovaries to check for cysts, and the 15th of August, I will find out what my CT scan showed. So, luckily I may not have PCOS afterall!I will post updates as I get them. But this could be great since we are trying to get pregnant again. :)